tisdag den nionde oktober

i am writing from my lair. i haven't had internet here save for when i wrote on september 23 and then now. it's really sucked not having internet.

i am very sick and lost my voice. i stayed home from my internship today. i really, really, really want to go to school tomorrow, and i will try to go unless i am even sicker.

i'm writing a paper on the operationalization of a human behavioral phenomenon within a psychological theory. if that sounds confusing, join the club. i know how to write english papers and research papers for art history, african-american studies and stuff like that, but not this theoreticalphenomenaloperationalizingframeworkingmodelling shit. i think i will turn out a decent paper. the next two papers for this course are more up my alley. i will do excellently on those. oh, and hopefully i won't be in a medicated, sick fog when i write them.

my lair is still a mess because i don't have time to unpack everything and organize it and put up shelves and other shit. it will be a process. i wanna have a halloween party. i dunno if that will happen.

due to my not having internet, my income from ebay in the last 30 days has been $27. i have a shitload of dvds to put on there. over a thousand dollars' worth, maybe even inching towards two thousand dollars' worth. i am gonna need that money. since i had absolutely no furniture (save a bookshelf) before i moved, i have had to buy all this furniture i have, and all this other shit i needed that i didn't have because i've been subletting till now. the money i've spent has added up big-time. plus i had to pay back the money i had borrowed to get this lair in the first place. i am so glad that christmas is coming. i have been on ebay for almost a year, and i remember how my stuff was going like hotcakes the closer christmas came. i have like, over 40 items in my ebay store, but no one wants them. they're just sitting there. i might have one sale per week. but hopefully those will start selling more the closer christmas comes, and the loads i'm putting on will sell, and i will get much-needed mooooolah! ebay will save my ass once again.

what else is there to say? i dunno. it's just school, internship, study, try to fix lair, eat, sleep. i don't have a social life. my shrink upped my dosage of meds. i've not been handling all the stress very well. i took to the drink again. this time i stayed away from the hard alcohol and focused on beer. well, i wanna cut way down on that, and it would be great to cut it out completely. i can't be a good social worker if i can't fucking take really good care of myself. so, i wanna just breathe more deeply and take it a bit easier and not be as hard on myself and stay away from the booze. the higher med dosage is helping, too.

no news of any crushes at school. i do have a little crush at work. it's nothing big. it's a little crush. i dunno the sexual orientation of the gurl. my gaydar does not go off except for the slight sexual tension i feel between us. nothing's gonna happen, though. it's just nice to have that feeling. :)

so, i have lots of papers due. one this week and two next week. egads. the one this week is the most difficult. i'm not worried about the other two.

next time, i will post a picture of my new cat, "katarina".